Angry Beatnik hates you.
Yes.
You.
So piss off.


June 22 2024 | Saturday
The only actual reason you're "implementing" "AI" is FOMO. Yeah, no, fuck you, it is.

September 7 2022 | Wednesday
Everyone, being an asshole, in Slack: “This obviously erroneous condition is occurring. Is that expected?”

December 7 2020 | Monday
Fuck you Medium. I’m not going to sign up to read someone’s free blog. Fuck you.

November 13 2020 | Friday
“PR’s welcome” (with the butcher’s apostrophe) is the new “See Figure 1″.

October 20 2020 | Tuesday
All you Lincoln Project-y, ‘responsible’ republicans, etc., who waited until the end to repudiate Trump: fuck you. Just, fuck you. You’re all complicit. You’re all traitors and fucking cowards.

October 16 2020 | Friday
‘Infrastructure’ ‘tooling’ right now is a pillar of shit shooting into the air, fueled by hype and silver-bullet-all-the-things. Look upon it. Despair.

September 16 2020 | Wednesday
For fuck’s sake, use your fucking pronouns.

September 4 2020 | Friday
Die. Nazi. Scum.

August 5 2020 | Wednesday
Vi for life you fucks

July 20 2020 | Monday
So these ‘border patrol’ cops in Portland driving around secret policing people are ‘not military’ and so ‘not violating’ the Posse Comitatus Act and this definitely isn’t the New World Order™ promised by Bush #1. Right?

July 15 2020 | Wednesday
Joe Rogan is Alex Jones lite.

June 19 2020 | Friday
Cloud Native ™ is the new Web Scale ™.

June 17 2020 | Wednesday
Attention slack: build native apps. Also fuck you.

June 8 2020 | Monday
Fuck you synaptic and libinput and oh also fuck you linux.

May 28 2020 | Friday
Agile is stupid, XP is stupid, scrum is stupid. Have you read the waterfall paper? Mythical Man Month? No? Then STFU.

May 22 2020 | Friday
Artisanal empanadas? Exactly my mood! We’ve achieved utopia.

May 19 2020 | Tuesday
JSON schema? But the whole point… fucking hell.

May 1 2020 | Friday
Save me two minutes of reading and I’ll just agree to be outraged.

April 30 2020 | Thursday
Fuck webp. Just, fuck webp.

March 18 2020 | Wednesday

…the Jackpot begins in the middle of the 21st century as a combination of climate change and other political issues, followed by a series of droughts, famines, pandemics, political chaos, and anarchy. 80% of the global human population dies off.

March 6 2020 | Friday
Thanks Sequoia, you’re dumbshits.

July 1 2019 | Monday
"Even bad estimates are better than no estimates." - 'Hacker' 'news' comment
"No estimate is clearly better." - Response to previous comment

June 26 2019 | Wednesday
I had to leave the building today so I wouldn’t yell at someone for not doing their job and then saying they can’t do it because nobody else has done it for them yet.

November 17 2009 | Tuesday
Little-endian utf-16? FUCK YOU AND YOUR MULTI FUCKING BYTE CSV FILE.

October 31st, 2009 | Saturday
Fuck you daylight saving time change. Fuck you and everyone that ever thought you were a good idea.

September 23 2009 | Wednesday
OMG APPLE AND ATNT TO MOVE INTO 20TH CENTURY WITH AMAZING NEW ‘EMM EMM ESS’ TECHNOLOGY - ANY DAY NOW

August 13 2009 | Friday
Diagramming applications: the shame of linux.

February 12th, 2009 | Friday
Microsoft rumored to be opening retail stores… HAHAHAHAHAHA

January 28th, 2009 | Wednesday
Fiscal conservatives? More like flat earthers.

January 12th, 2009 | Monday
THANKS UBUNTU FOR LINKING /BIN/SH TO THE CRAPTACULAR DASH SHELL

December 29 2008 | Monday
Stop using quotation marks for emphasis. Douchebags.

December 24 2008 | Wednesday
Goodbye circuit city, and good fucking riddance.

March 24 2008 | Monday

AP: In a surreal moment that will define the rest of his career, Rand Paul loses control of his bowels while berating a wheelchair-bound Afghanistan veteran for his (as Paul put it) "phony and meaningless" sacrifice.

February 3 2008 | Sunday
If the roles were reversed

January 17 2008 | Thursday
Chertoff is a fucking douche.

January 11 2008 | Friday
Jimmy’s got you, you fucks

December 26 2007 | Wednesday
I’M THE COMMANDER GUY
COMPASSIONATE CONSERVATIVE
UNITER NOT A DIVIDER
I AM THE DECIDER
COALITION OF THE WILLING
AXIS OF EVIL
EVIL DOERS
KNOWNS AND UNKNOWNS
BRING ‘EM ON
SHOCK AND AWE
SIX DAYS
SIX WEEKS
SIX MONTHS TOPS
FUZZY MATH
IT’S A NUMBER
GREETED AS LIBERATORS
OIL WILL PAY FOR THE WAR
IT’S HARD WORK
SLAM DUNK
THE ARMY YOU HAVE
FLIP FLOP
ADAPT TO WIN
HECK OF A JOB, BROWNIE
CUT AND RUN
WHEN THEY STAND UP
A GODDAMNED PIECE OF PAPER
WE’LL STAND DOWN
OLD EUROPE
NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND
ENHANCED INTERROGATION
A NEW WAY FORWARD
THE U.S. DOES NOT TORTURE
STUFF HAPPENS
CAKE WALK
EXIT STRATEGY
STAY THE COURSE
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I’M A WAR PRESIDENT
JUST A COMMA IN HISTORY
I DON’T RECALL
FAMILY VALUES

December 24 2007 | Monday
Fuck you Christmas

December 11 2007 | Tuesday
Haxor Economist site dead long live Haxor Economist

December 10 2007 | Monday

FUCK YOU ALL

December 7 2007 | Friday
Goodbye compusa. And good fucking riddance.

December 4 2007 | Tuesday
The US dollar is worth more than the Canadian dollar again - by a margin of .0112. FEAR THE WORLD’S MIGHTIEST ECONOMY!

November 30 2007 | Friday
What’s angrybeatnik? 1) Santa Barbara hippies are just angry beatniks. 2) Fuck you.

November 27 2007 | Tuesday
Alexander Hamilton, your neocon dickwads have destroyed this country. It may be too late. FUCK YOU.

November 21 2007 | Wednesday

November 16 2007 | Friday
Ruth’s Chris in Santa Barbara has a dress code. HAHAHAHAHAHA where the fuck do you asshats think you are?

October 7 2007 | Sunday
Well, congratulations seem to be in order. The enlightenment project has released 0.16.8.10 after only 22 SHORT YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT! WAY TO GO ASSHOLES!  LET’S HOPE FOR 0.16.8.11 BEFORE I FUCKING DIE!

September 30 2007 | Sunday
Your [insert topic] sucks.

September 28 2007 | Friday Cell phone carriers: fuck you. Broadband carriers: fuck you. Free this and that carriers: fuck YOU.

September 18 2007 | Tue
Angrybeatnik hates flying. Flying sucks.

September 17 2007 | Monday

Franchise coffee bar under attack.
Project Mayhem has begun.